"Rick, it's Jim."
He could practically hear the tech blink. "Jemima?"
"No, Jim." He paused. "You know, Jim Tanner, from the center."
"Oh, I see. So what's the nerd got into this time?"
This time, Jim blinked. Rick thought he was someone else calling on his behalf? Well, it was kind of understandable with that voice... Okay, if that made it simpler...
"Well... it's kind of the other way round."
"Alright, so what got into him?"
"Nanites."
"Bloody hell! You mean they're transforming him?"
Jim looked down at him/herself. "Actually it looks like they're finished..."
The oaths coming down the line this time were definitely not meant for a lady's ear. When Jim's ears stopped burning, the first thing he heard clearly was: "Okay, he's transformed. Into what?"
Jim took a deep breath and tried to calm down. This was it. The moment of truth, as it were.
He squeaked, "Me."
"Beg your pardon?"
"Me! He turned into me! I'm him!"
There was a long pause.
"Er...Jim?"
"Yes?"
"Dude, you sound like a... woman."
"I am. Well, a female at least."
"Just when I thought it couldn't get any weirder... A female what?"
"Skunk."
"Wow. Are you sexy?"
"Rick!"
"Just curious. Well, are you?"
He took another look in the mirror. "Well, yeah... guess I am."
"Great. Are you doing anything on Saturday?"
Jim groaned. "That's not funny."
"Who says I'm trying to be funny? I like skunks. And before you say "Not this one!" - remember that time in Darjeeling?"
"That was ages ago!"
"Yeah, but I never got even with you for that one, did I? So let's say I will help you - on the condition that you go out with me first."
Jim took a deep breath and started counting to ten while struggling to keep his tail down. Before he reached six, Rick spoke again:
"Just take your time to answer. And while you're thinking, have a look in the yellow pages and see how many people specialize in this sort of thing. They don't exactly have a section of their own, do they?"
Sat Jan 27 02:12:31 2001