“I look ridiculous…”
Rick brushed his freshly shaved head with a scowl on his face, honestly now missing the long, luscious red locks which feminized him so. Admittedly it was much cooler on such a hot day, but he realized that he was getting more strange looks at his smooth and thick legs and big bulging breasts now that his hair was undeniably masculine.
“Did you really have to cut it so short?”
Daphne cocked her hip out with a tsk from her lips. “Well, if you stayed still while I was shaving your head in the car, I wouldn’t have had to readjust so many times.” She flicked her own red hair with a smirk. “Thus, we have busty buzz-cut Rick, ready to serve.” She saluted, “and c’mon, it doesn’t look that bad.”
“But you only messed up so bad,” Rick hushed his voice as much as his frustration would allow, well aware of the fancy foyer they were in, “because you insisted on riding Jim’s dick the whole drive!” He adjusted his white top, trying fruitlessly to cover more oozing cleavage, and huffed, “I can see where your priorities are, bouncing like a rabbit in the back seat…”
”Um…” Daphne didn’t even deny as she put her fingers around Jim’s neck, tickling his shoulder. “Have you had Jim-dick, Rick?” Her tone was piercing and almost echoing in the white hall of fancy lunching suits and dresses. “It’s scientifically proven to bring every girl a smile, and it’s a gift that keeps on giving and giving and giving.” She lowered her hand to start petting Jim’s barely concealed meat baton, feeling the vein beneath his jeans. “The only problem is,” she sighed, “it is attached to probably the biggest dork on the planet, but I cope.” She smirked at Jim, placing a kiss on his lips. “Mainly I just think it’s Kevin Zeffram big strong arms doing me, and that gets me through.”
”And I imagine that it’s Robin Foster boinking my dick, but then I realize that this hottie on me has much fuller and sexier tits for me to grip and suck on.” Jim’s tone was somehow louder than his girlfriends as he gripped her full pale tits, and smushed his head between them for a full motor-boat which slobbered its noise to the rest of the foyer like a real motor revving.
“That’s sweet of you to say, Jimbo.” Daphne cooed and their playful banter dropped fast into full spit swapping, her tongue diving into his mouth, Jim’s hungry lips sucking on her greedy flapping langue which filled his mouth. “Mmm I want more of that big dick between my big tits, honey! I want you to squeeze them while I milk that mind-blowing fuck-stick of yours!” Her tone was wet and ready, despite already having made love and finishing several times on the way here.
“You two are insane…” Rick quietly mumbled as he peaked out of the window, spying his car parked just out front and wondering if that was a smart place to leave it.
L’Haute Platitude was known as the place to rub elbows with the privileged at lunch or dinner, the white marble flooring and pillars so sparkling that you could see your overpriced reflection at any angle. The only thing more shocking than the prices here was the waiting list to get inside, so Rick was pretty surprised when Jimmy suggested going here to sate his girlfriend’s growling stomach. He only agreed to go to such a high-class restaurant in the end after considering the fact that Jim finally might have grown too cocky for his britches, finally a situation in which his scientifically enhanced Jim-Dick might not be able to help him!
The register which the greeted guests had been empty upon their arrival, but an epic clearing of the throat informed all three teens that they were readied to be denied service. The head waitress tapped a pen to the paper in front of her, looking up from thick rimmed glasses, her dark hair done up in a bun as tight as her demeanour as her tinged red lips parted. “May I help you children?” Despite being no doubt an American with East Asian roots, her accent was still of a French stereotype rarely found outside of French maid roleplaying in the bedroom.
“Uh yes.” Jim raised a finger. “Table for three.”
The sigh from her lips was epic. “And should I even bother looking for le name in question?”
“McNutt.” Jim doubled down on his confidence, putting his hands on his hips with a smirk.
Her eyes rolled, long nail trailing down the paper held by the tome until it hit her flat chest of a black tie and simple white blouse. “Une grande surpriz, I do not find a ‘Mic’ or a ‘Nut’ anywhere on my list.” Her glance up could freeze a flame. “Perhaps McNutt could go to McDonalds instead? It would fit your fashion much better.”
“Oh I know it’s not on there, Mademoiselle.” Jim leaned over her ledger, a finger landing on the list. “You’re just going to add my name right here, and escort us to our table.” He winked at the confused waitress.
”You’ve lost it, Jimmy!” Rick groaned, starting to pull on his shoulder, “Let’s just go somewhere else.”
”Hold on, my large breasted, long legged friend. We haven’t got our table!” He tapped on the ledger more forcefully.
”Oh McNutt!” The leading waitress growled in a low voice to ensure no other patron heard. “The only thing I’m considering at the moment is whether to escort you out myself or to call the police.” She swatted his hand away and pointed at the name he was tapping at. “Regard Monsieur. Unless you are Abigail Frodame, the Sausage Queen of Shadow Peaks, I suggest you leave before I get, oh how you say in English, emphatique?”
”Snooty, I think is the word you’re looking for.” Jim helpfully added before being yanked back by Daphne.
“Look, babe.” Daphne had always the most sexist vocab of the three. “I get the game you’re playing. We make some claims, you push back and we all have a laugh. But let’s cut to the poînt, luv.” She put a hand into her purse and pulled out the big green bill without a president on it and placed the hundred on her ledger.
“You don’t honestly believe that I’d accept a mere hundred dollar bribe at a location where that barely affords you a glass of tap water…” She picked up a phone beside her station, the police on speed-dial.
“Oh no, sweet cheeks.” Daphne chuckled, waving the bill between her fingers like a fan. “It’s a bet. If I can prove to you why my boyfriend deserves the title of Sausage Royalty way better than this lady here, we’ll take her table. If not, you’ll get this crisp bill and we’ll leave. Win-win no?”
“And how, pray tell, do you expect to demonstrate this feat?” Her arms crossed but she hadn’t put the phone down yet.
“Because my man is the Sausage King.” Daphne put her arms out with a look on her face that spelled no bullshit. “This long.” There was over a foot between her palms.
Rick was certain that the past patience of this maître d’s was now going to call the police, but to his surprise the phone was put down. “Bêtise… No man’s saucisse is of such length.”
Daphne calmly pushed Jim by the butt past the station between them and the mademoiselle. She slowly gripped at his crotch, showing the outline of something large and cylindrical going down his jeans. Her smile grew the lower her little fingers went, getting closer to the knee before the blushing server had enough.
“That’s it!” She grunted as she grabbed them both by the shoulder. “I-If doing this silly farce gets you three out of here quicker, then come with me!” Like a good hostess, she lead them into a nearby closet, pushing them both inside the cleaning storage room before closing the white door behind her.
Thankfully, the door was still slightly ajar, so Rick crept up next to it and put his ear to the door. He heard the distant murmuring behind it, the owners of the voices not hard to pick out.
“Alright. Make it quick. Whip it out so I can laugh and then kick these black heels far up your derrières.”
”With pleasure, mademoiselle.”
*Ziiiiiiip*
“QUOI!?”
“So, is he the sausage king?”
“It’s impossible! It’s unthinkable! I-It’s incroyable! My boyfriend doesn’t even come to a third of its length… and not even a fifth of that massive girth and-”
”Yeah, well he’s my boyfriend not yours. Can we get a seat now?”
“Eh bien… I like being a woman of my word, but… if my chef finds out that I gave an important client’s table away, I’ll lose my position!”
“What if we could sweeten the deal further? Did you bring your other tool, Jimbo?”
“Yup.”
*ZAP*
“Oh là là!”
Rick was a little surprised by what seemed like a camera’s flash coming from the other side, but was downright shocked at the change he observed as a topless server came out. Bouncing in an overflowing lace bra, the previously average Asian bust of this leading waitress had increased multiple round sizes, the twin soft orbs now large enough to lose a dozen pens between, and Rick lost himself completely in that six inches of flawless cleavages. She pulled out three menus from her station, struggling the whole time to fit her white blouse on before smiling, “this way please.”
Daphne was beaming the entire way as they followed the maitre d’s quadruple Ds to a splendid six-chair table right by the window, places set impeccably. However, Rick wasn’t so pleased. “Did you use the BE-ray?!?!”
“Yeah…” Jim shrugged as he spied the cute butt in that tight skirt of the woman who would be serving them today. “What’s wrong?”
”That thing is so unstable!” Rick’s arms flailed, almost knocking a bowl of soup from it’s tray.
“Oh c’mon now.” Jim flapped his wrist as he pulled out a chair for a grateful Daphne. “That was the old BE-ray. The new one works every time...”
”Yeah. 60% of the time it works every time…” Rick rolled his eyes, barely noticing how their waitress pressed her new assets into his face as she placed a napkin on his lap.
She giggled, “Oh pardon me! I’m not used to having such a balcon upon my chest!”
“No apologies needed, babe.” Daphne waved her hand, pointing at her own chest. “I know the power of a good rack.”
“Please, call me Yvonne, and I’ll be your server today.”
“Well? What do we want?” Jim looked at the menu, seeing more pompous French titles than a film festival. “We’ve got all these interesting choices we can barely pronounce.”
”Eh.” Daphne shrugged, not even giving her menu a glance. “Burger and fries sound pretty good.”
Rick raised an eyebrow, face growing a bit red as he put a palm to his face. Jim just shrugged nodding. “Whatever makes my girlfriend happy. Three burgers and fries.”
Yvonne’s usual snobbish opinion was overridden by fascination in her own breasts, the new buoyancy just an endless well of fun as she held them up, only for them to bounce down. “Eh… Three steak hachés et frites it is.” She pulled out a notepad to write that down, but instead of placing it back in her pocket, she got a sly look and pushed that little notepad in pocket created by her fabulous new cleavage. “And to drink?”
“Liquor?” Daphne winked at Yvonne, who merely dutifully nodded.
“Make mine strong please.” Rick moaned as he looked at the smirk and devious sparkle in Jim’s face.
“Now, guys…” Jim pulled his BE-Ray from his pocket and placed in on the table, “Who wants to test this thing out more?”
“Yvonne!?” Rick lifted his hands, “Make it a double!”
Wed May 02 05:59:02 2018
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4 comments Last updated: Thu May 3 23:43:01 2018