Ranma ½: HOPA - This is honestly the pragmatic option.

Unending BE - episode 1253724

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Right then! It was nice to see Soun’s daughters so properly enthusiastic about the engagement. Of course, they probably didn’t know about the curse yet. So perhaps Genma should get some hot water.

“Damn she’s not wearing a bra.” Nabiki commented, one hand on Ranma’s chest.

“Nabiki!” Akane said, glaring at her sister, “Don’t say things like that.”

“That’s right Nabiki.” Kasumi nodded, “It’s only natural Ranma dear isn’t wearing one.” After all to contain those beauties is a crime.

Genma ignored the comment on the bra, as is his wont. Now it should be noted that Genma is the only person on the planet who isn’t drooling over that Hot Piece of Ass that is his son. Mostly because, well, Ranma’s his son, and that drooling over her would be creepy.

And thank God for that. The sign Genma held up to the 4th Wall said. Before turning back to Soun, who just looked kind of baffled. Hey Tendo! Where’s the hot water?

Soun blinked at the sign, before quietly pointing ot the kitchen. With a nod the panda walked off.

Meanwhile, Ranma found herself in a blind.

Not a literal bind, but that was a concern for later, but rather wondering what the hell she was going to do. There were three really hot ladies arguing over which one was to become her wife.

“How does that even work? This is late 80s/early 90s Japan ain’t it?” Ranma said, “They can’t marry me, is gay marriage even a thing in Japan in 2017?”

Don’t ask me. Plus you’re really a man so does that matter?

“Look it up you jackass. And they don’t know that yet.”

Meanwhile, the three sisters found themselves at an impasse. Well reasoned, logical arguments had failed, emotional arguments had failed. So the question of who to get to claim this Hot Piece of Ass had been reduced to more base arguments.

“Frankly, since I have the biggest breasts I’m sure I’d be better.” Kasumi said without a hint of shame, before pulling Ranma into another hug and planting her face straight into those mammaries.

Nabiki scoffed at that. “Please sis, it’s not the size of the package it’s how you use it.” She pulled Ranma away, one could almost hear the pop. “I’m sure Ranma wants something with some youthful energy rather than an old lady.

“I’m two years older than you.” Kasumi said.

“What Ranma needs.” Akane said, patting Ranma on the shoulder, “Is someone who shares common interests, you do Martial Arts right Ranma?”

“Er.. yes.” Ranma said.

“See! Neither of you practice, so obviously if this is for the sake of the Dojo the two of us are the best options. So come on Ranma, let’s go get some practice in.” Akane said with a wide smile, the implication that their spar would end with much less clothing than they started with.

That’s when the panda came back in and upended a tea kettle over Ranma’s head.

There was another silence, meanwhile Genma poured the water over his head. “There we go! Now Ranma, which one do you like more?”

Ranma picked up one of the discarded signs and whacked Genma over the head with it. “Don’t ask such a dumbass question!” He turned to the sisters, “Err, sorry, that curse is a pain in the ass. Err…”

“Well that settles one thing.” Kasumi said brightly.

“Yup. Akane hates boys, so it’s just me and you now.” Nabiki said.

“Excuse me? I hate boys not men.” Akane said.

“Err… what? But the curse… I’m a normal guy again!” Ranma said to the heavens, or rather to me.

“Look, Ranma-baby.” Nabiki said, “Sure, you turn into a hot guy. I guess that’s your regular body and the hot girl is new?” Ranma nodded, and Nabiki continued. “Yeah I guess we could go all suddenly uninterested or normal behavior. But we all know how that would go in the thread.”

“There’d be long scenes alternating between us crawling all over you and acting normal and embarrassed.” Akane said, “Sounds annoying.”

Kasumi clapped her hands together, “I know, we could all marry him!”

“First off, that can’t work, second, the author’s already doing a thread where we're all married to him.” Nabiki said.

“Really?” Akane asked.

“Yeah, you know, that one where he goes from being clobbered to marrying us all.” Nabiki said.

“Oh yeah, that one..” Akane said, “But… why is Ranma also involved in a rip off of Quantum Leap?”

“I think it’s best not to ask questions like that.”

“Well… one of us could marry him while he screws the other two on the side.” Kasumi said.

“Err do I get a choice in this?” Ranma asked.

“Well you can pick which one of us to marry.” Akane said.

“Really? I thought you at least would be tsundere about it.” Ranma grumbled.

“Look I’m just glad I’m not as we speak being bimboized.” Akane said, before suddenly grabbing Ranma and pushing her chest up against him. “So let’s go get married now.”

“Err…. can’t we wait for a bit?”

“Damn it I want to be a virgin on my wedding night though!”

“Would... would not getting married tonight change that?”

“Yes.” All three sisters said at once.

Hoo-boy.

“Honestly I half expect this to go the sort of cliche situation you’ve all seen in dozens of hentai manga.” Nabiki said dryly, “Where all three of us have sex with him to make him decide to see who’s better.”

“Come on Nabiki, that's not necessary.” Kasumi said.

“Sis I know you’re going to finish that with saying because it’s obvious who’s better, so don’t even try the implications.”

“Good to see they’re so enthusiastic Tendo!” Genma laughed, slapping Soun on the back. “...Tendo?” Soun’s eyes were open, yet he wasn’t moving. A wave of the hand in front of the face showed no response.

“Oh he fainted standing up.” Kasumi said, “Probably the shock of hearing us talk about sex.”

Go back - Go to the parent episode.

Tritan

Sun Jun 11 18:02:58 2017

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