Chucky Cheze ran screaming like a girl, Jason stomping right after him. First Chucky went this way, and then he went that way, and then, completely lost and confused, he ran back the way he had come. Jason followed doggedly every step of the way. And then Chucky saw his refuge - the bathroom! He ran towards it, ready to shut the door and lock himself inside, safe from the monstrous terror of Jason. But just before he reached the door somebody else ran into it and slammed it shut in his face! Chucky vaguely recognized the guy as Paolo Prizzi.
"Nooooooooo!" Chucky wailed and kept on running. Jason was still right behind him. And then Chucky spotted another bathroom and, gathering all of his remaining strength, sprinted for it. The door loomed closer and closer, just a few more feet and he would be safe!
And that's when he noticed the girl in the cheerleading outfit running straight for him from the other side of the hallway. And behind the girl were two blood-spattered, blazing-eyed, claw-fingered vampire Brides.
Chucky reached the bathroom at exactly the same instant that the cheerleader did. "Hey! This is my safe haven from the forces of evil!" she screamed and tried to push past him. Chucky squeaked incoherently in reply and tried to get inside first. They slammed right into each other, their arms and legs getting so tangled up that they almost got stuck right there in the doorway. And then, to make matters worse, the cheerleader started to bitch-slap him! Luckily for Chucky though he was a far more experienced bitch-slapper and managed to get past the shrieking little spitfire. And then they slammed the door closed.
SLAM!
The door shook and thudded as the forces of evil tried to break through, but it was a sturdy door and would not be overcome. Neither by the supernatural ferocity of the Brides of Dracula, although it must be said that they were more concerned with not breaking their nails, nor by the hideous pounding of Jason, who admittedly was handicapped by his plastic machete, could the door be battered down. And then the thunderous barrage stopped and from the other side of the door Chucky and the cheerleader could hear... nothing. And then, a moment or two later... something. And then, a couple of moments after that, they realized that Jason and the Brides had apparently gotten into an argument and were duking it out among themselves.
Chucky and the cheerleader leaned back against the door and heaved a sigh of relief. And then they looked at each other and their relief immediately turned to disgust.
"Nerd," the cheerleader muttered.
"Cheerleader," Chucky replied condescendingly.
"Geek," she retorted angrily.
"Slut," he said accusingly.
"Loser," she answered with a sneer.
"Bitch," he exclaimed, a bit defensively.
"Chronic masturbator," she laughed contemptuously.
"Future Miss Trailer Park White Trash of America!" he spat out venomously.
"Why you little--!" she spluttered, outraged beyond control, and reached out to strangle him. "WAAAAAAH!" Chucky screamed and fell backward to the floor. The cheerleader pounced on him and grabbed his throat in her hands. "I'm gonna teach you calling me white trash!" she blared as she straddled him, her fingers squeezing his neck. Chucky tried to push her away, but she was just too strong and way too riled up. Staring up at her all he saw was her contorted face, murder in her pretty green eyes; her short red hair all wild and out-of-whack, although in a sultry kind of way; her full red lips drawn back in a beastly, and yet quite sexy, grimace; her fair skinned cheeks flushed red beneath her provocatively sensual makeup. Boy, Chucky thought, she sure did look pretty when she was mad.
And then the cheerleader suddenly stopped. A look of both consternation and repulsion crossed her face. And then she stood up, looked down and, pointing with one attractively manicured finger, shouted out, "How dare you!"
Chucky looked at what she was pointing at. Right where she had been sitting on him his pants were tented upward. "You - you - pervert!" she screeched. Chucky looked up at her, then back down at his boner, then back up at the irate cheerleader. And then he began to giggle. Like a donkey with a sore throat.
Go back - Go to the parent episode.
Sat Nov 05 23:09:27 2005