Gilligan was now running ahead of Jim and waving at an overweight man in a dark T shirt and wearing a skipper's hat. "Skipper! Skipper!" He called.
"What's up, little buddy?" The skipper replied. Then he saw Jim behind Gilligan and broke into a big grin. "Are we being rescued?"
"Skipper! Skipper!" Gilligan panted, stopping next to him. "You won't believe what's happened -"
"Later, little buddy!" The Skipper told him. "Right now tell me who your friend is? And are we being rescued?"
Gilligan shook his head, trying to catch his breath. "You don't understand, Skipper! TheProfessor'steleportationdevicemalfunctionedandnowthere'sthisbigblondeonthebeachwithfourhugeboobsandwhenshewalksshewobbleshereandjigglesthereandshakeseveywhere-"
"Slow down, little buddy! I can't understand a thing you're saying! What's this about a big blonde woman on the beach?"
"Andshe'sgotthesetwogiantcocksthatshecanpickyouupwithandliftyouintohergiantboobsand-"
The Skipper was aghast, swatting Gilligan with his hat. "Did you just say cock? You can't say that on our island! This is a family show! What will the censors say?"
"Well! Wait till the censors sees what's on the beach!" Gilligan protested.
"What's he talking about?" The Skipper asked Jim. "And not to be rude, but who are you? And do you have a boat?"
"I'm Jim," Jim answered, "And no, I don't have a boat."
"Then how did you get here?"
"That's what I'm trying to tell you, Skipper!" Gilligan interrupted. "Something went wrong with the Professor's teleportation device. Instead of transporting us out of here, it transported him here andnowthere'sthisbigblondewomanonthebeachwithhugeknockers-"
"Huge knockers?" The Skipper repeated. "Did you say there's a woman on the beach with huge knockers?"
Gilligan nodded. "The biggest you've ever seen!"
"Wow!" The Skipper grinned, imagining that. "This I've got to see! Excuse me, Jim! But we've never had a woman on the island with huge knocker's before. Which way is she?"
"She's back that way," Jim replied. "But you should know she's my girlfriend and-"
"You're girlfriend?" The Skipper echoed. "Oh! Sorry! But don't worry! I won't touch her. I just want to get a good look at her." And with that he hurried off.
"Skipper! Wait!" Gilligan started after him. "You don't understand!"
Jim grabbed him and pulled him back. "Forget him! Where's the Professor! We need to do something about Sharon before she fucks us all!!"
Go back - Go to the parent episode.
Fri Jul 7 10:30:03 2000