Vő “Saul” Sau had prepared everything perfectly. Bright reddish flowers which a disinterested florist said were popular, non-fragrant candles expertly fengshuied and a bottle of red wine with a clever pun which didn't break the wallet; surely this was a perfect contrast to the freezing Toronto night outside. Tonight, he was going prove that he knew how to use a calendar and show Cristiana how to properly celebrate a 3 months anniversary.
...And then he was going to be laid like never before!
A quick knock at his apartment door made him jump, almost making him create a candle domino effect, which was not the kind of heat he wanted tonight!. He took a big deep breath and made sure he looked presentable, but not too presentable. His hair was a bit untamed, but it gave him a bit of a wild look, much better than the stereotypical bowl cut during his high school career. To further downplay any Vietnamese stereotypes, he was wearing a blue flannel shirt, blue jeans, a Blue Jays cap, and shoes, that he admitted, added half an inch to his height. Why did this new girl have to be so tall? Another knock at the door made him take a big inhale, praying that casual Canadian was the style to go with. He quickly put a bracelet which he only wore when he was with her, and headed towards the door.
He opened the door perhaps a little to eagerly and smiled brightly into the hallway. The tall olive skinned beauty leaned against the opposite wall shivering. Her long smooth legs tightly enclosed by blue jeans and furry black boots with still melting snow on the bottom. Her thick purple snow-coat was unzipped to reveal her thin torso wearing simple black tank-top. A golden crucifix, which she always wore, drew attention to her perky chest which created a small but natural shelf of cleavage for the cross to rest upon. Saul soaked up the sight quite greedily and excitedly but only now realized her delicate hands were shaking through her curly mid-shoulder length raven hair, her eyes bloodshot.
“S-Saul?” Her lips were trembling, “Paul died...”
His eyes opened in shock. Not about the death of her pet parrot of course, she had told him that she had owned him for many years. He was shocked that his new girlfriend, who seemed to be so cool about everything so far, was so emotional about her pet, on the day of their anniversary no less. He thought that if someone was weird and cool enough to own a parrot, like the good girl Christian hipster she always tried to be, they wouldn't make a big deal of it. However, here she was, in tears and looking for emotional support from him. Unexpected to say the least.
He realized that he had been staying in silence for a couple of seconds so he needed to do at least something. He held out his hands, “Uh... Sorry?”
She rushed forward to press her body into his, her taller form surrounding him, “Oh god... I-I just can't believe this could happen! Today of all days... Is this a sign from God?”
Saul's eye twitched as he looked around, praying to the God of Love that this was some “3-month anniversary test” or something equally horrible. “Come inside Cris.” He begrudgingly said.
Grabbing his hand she forced them both inside his place and onto the couch. “I just really need a good person right now! I found him in the cage and-and...”
He deliberately turned his head from her to roll his eyes, “I will get you some tissues.”
Walking to his washroom, he sighed as he picked up a box of Kleenex. He gripped it hard as thoughts of all the sex he was not going to have now. This was yet another example of reality coming down on him, should he ever expect anything good to happen to him? He was an adult, so he knew this was a part of being one, and he was trying to make a realistic relationship. However, he had fantasized about this night for the last 2 weeks, and he wondered why this was happening. Perhaps he was watching too much porn? He certainly got lost in the fantasy which was dating a hottie out his league like Cristiana. But was it too much to ask for just for one day where he was in a porno and forget his troubles?
He exited the washroom and delicately handed the sobbing girl the box. She looked up lovingly, “Thank you Saul... Can we watch a superhero film? Preferable something with Chris Evans?” She managed to say with a smile.
That was the cool girl he liked to hang out with. The one who grew up with 5 brothers, could kick his ass in any video game, kindly volunteered at church, lock-picks as a hobby and even liked his harmonica playing. He was glad she wasn't gone tonight, so as he set up his TV for Netflix, he cuddled next to her as she dabbed her eyes.
“Oh Saul, it looked like you went to a lot of work for me tonight. Thank you.”
He smiled as it looked like things were back on track, “No problem. I mean it is a special day right?”
She nodded, “Yes. Paul was a special bird!”
“Well that and you know...”
She sniffed, “What?”
Tilting his head, he noticed no humor in her voice. He sighed, “So you don't remember... Never mind. You want a glass of wine or something?”
*POOF*
“It's right in front of us right?” She pointed to a bright pink wine bottle on his coffee table which seemed to sparkle.
“No...” He faded off as he picked up the bottle which certainly wasn't there before Cristiana knocked. It had P.L. on the label written in cursive and only a small little booklet attached to the top. The inside didn't even describe the taste!
Change your life with P.L. and forget your troubles.
WARNING: Do not heat L.P. and do not put it in the freezer, or in direct sunlight. Do not mix with water. Do not consume more than 3 glasses a day. For refill information, please go to www.l.p.cum.
“I could really go for some wine now Saul. Can you pour me a quickie?” Cristiana pouted as she waited, was she about to cry again?
Saul shook the bottle and pondered what his next move would be. He certainly could go with a change in his life, but where had this thing come from?
Mon Oct 19 12:26:13 2015
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